Hey girl, did you know that Ryan Gosling is about to be a dad? Neither did anyone else until this week, but when he and girlfriend Eva Mendes broke the news, the internet exploded with highly inappropriate amounts of “grief.” Well, it was mostly just Twitter. Well, mostly just overdramatic Gosling and Notebook fans. But in honor of these poor lovestruck souls (you can read some choice tweets below) we’ve compiled a list of five other people you are never going to date – no matter how much you’d like to.

Ryan Gosling
Gosling and Mendes got together in 2011, so he's technically been off the market for some time now.

Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie. When asked to choose between this power couple, most people would be fine with either. Jolie is intelligent, charitable, worldly and stunning. Brad Pitt, even after his hey-day is… how do we put this delicately… hot, not to mention a creative and business-savvy force to be reckoned with. Fortunately for them, they seem to have found a good thing – lasting marriage, a whole litter of children and thriving careers to boot. Unfortunately for us, this means that both are off the market for good. The same largely applies to Beyonce and Jay Z, by the way. 

Click through to the next page to have more of your hopes dashed.