Allison Burnett

Allison Burnett

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Untraceable Review


Bad
It would be wonderful if this review of the newest cyber-torture-stalker-thriller could begin with the words "Untraceable is unwatchable," but sadly that would be a lie. Our tastes have very simply become too degraded over the years for us not to have become used to it as studios have continued to shove out purposeless dreck like this. Call it a formula inoculation, as the films keep coming, with only the slightest noticeable tweaks to their dependable structure (as necessitated by the latest spasms in popular culture that allow a soupcon of relevancy to creep in), we very simply get used to it, no matter how awful.

And awful it is. In a desperate bid to glom on to the Internet's evergreen supposed hipness, the script (a lifeless accumulation of the expected by a trio of writers who really should know better) puts us inside an FBI cyber-crime unit where flint-eyed but tender-hearted agent Jennifer Marsh (Diane Lane) tracks down the worst of the online worst. Stirring from her bank of computer monitors only to get coffee or crack wise with fellow agent Griffin Dowd (Colin Hanks), Marsh is your prototypical wounded female cop with a young daughter and fretful mother at home, and a dead husband in her memory. (If her character had been male they'd have given her a bad temper and a drinking problem, but at least the sarcastic partner bit is gender neutral.) She gets put on the kind of case that (literally) only exists in the movies. Some psycho sets up a website called "Kill With Me" whose hook is that the more people view it, the quicker the subject on camera dies by some fiendish means. The first time out, it's a kitten; after that a person, and then another, and then another...

Continue reading: Untraceable Review

Red Meat Review


Weak
They "go to the gym, eat red meat, and talk about girls."

And so this straight-to-DVD-after-five-years-on-the-shelf flick would be dismissed as a pale imitation of In the Company of Men, if only it weren't written and directed by a woman, Allison Burnett. And not only is she a woman, she's the very woman who wrote both Bloodsport III: Forced to Fight and Autumn in New York!*

Continue reading: Red Meat Review

Allison Burnett

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Allison Burnett Movies

Untraceable Movie Review

Untraceable Movie Review

It would be wonderful if this review of the newest cyber-torture-stalker-thriller could begin with the...

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