HMV are known to be haemorrhaging money left right and centre, so is it too cynical to suggest that a new rule forbidding their staff from having long hair and tattoos is in the hope that some on the pay roll may walk rather than needing to be pushed? Probably. Besides, until the last stores close they’ll presumably need to replace these outlandish skin-inked cads.

Nevertheless, the music and entertainment chain’s new “appearance policy” has been met with grumbles after it forbid tats, long hair and asked male employees to wear blue denim jeans and female employees to wear denim skirts. Nice trainers are a must too, apparently, with staff expected to keep “high standards of personal grooming”, according to The Sun. One particular worker has grumbled “We’ve got new management. It’s ridiculous and discrimination.” Failure to comply with these rules gets you the boot.

The Sun points out that Jack White and Ed Sheeran would be among the music stars unable to get a job at HMV now, though you’d have to argue that this is a loss that won’t really affect them. More amusing is the fact that the news comes in close proximity to HMV’s Mama Group company have just bought 50% in ATP, a company whose festivals attract all amount of tattooe’d bearded ne’er do wellers.