8) Bikini Bloodbath Christmas

If you have ever sat wishing that the movie genre triumvirate - horror, festive and soft porn - would someday be all rolled into one blood-sloshingly weird movie, then B-movie masterpiece Bikini Bloodbath Christmas is the only movie for you. The third in the Bikini Bloodbath trilogy after Bikini Bloodbath and Bikini Bloodbath Carwash, Bloodbath Christmas similarly seeks to parody the old fashioned slashers whilst making sure there's always plenty of cleavage on show.

Bikini Bloodbath Christmas...Seriously
Our Prayers Have Been Answered: This Is The Film The World Has Been Waiting For!

The movie sees the return of Rob Coz's Death Chef who stalks Jenny (Rachael Robbins) and Sharon (Niki Rubin) yet again. Director and writer Edward Seymour claims that Peter Jackson's The Lord of the Rings films inspired him to create a trilogy of movies and indeed, Bloodbath Christmas is certainly inspired.

When Ms. Johnson (Debbie Rochon) falls into a coma, Debbie and Sharon go to work in her 'Bong Shoppe' and are drawn into a battle with a nearby Jewish deli with the murderous Death Chef somehow being brought back from the grave in the process. The film climaxes with the girls racing to take out the cleaver-wielding Chef before the event of the year: the eggnog wrestling match.

Next Page: Don't Open Till Christmas.

7) Don't Open Till Christmas

British Christmas horror Don't Open Till Christmas may have been branded as "barely watchable" by DVD Verdict but just because it's a bit of a turkey doesn't mean it's not a prime candidate for mindless movie consumption after Elf, The Grinch and It's A Wonderful Life have been shown for the umpteenth time on telly this year.

Don't Open Till Christmas
Maybe Pick A Different Outfit For Your Christmas Do This Year.

In a London setting, a cold-hearted killer is going around slaughtering anyone dressed in a Santa outfit in increasingly stomach-churning ways, including having a spear thrown at them, having their face roasted alongside some chestnuts, castration, being slashed with a machete, electrocution and an exploding present. The killer abducts a stripper, Sherry (Wendy Danvers), and intends for her to be "the supreme sacrifice to all the evil that Christmas is." Sounds like someone never got that toy truck they wanted.

Watch The 'Don't Open Till Christmas' Trailer:

Scotland Yard's Chief Inspector Harris, played by the movie's director Edmund Purdom, is soon on the case but risks his life. It is soon discovered that the killer, played by Alan Lake, has a very particular hatred of Santa for a very special reason. Don't even think about missing this if you love your Christmas flicks cheesy, silly and a bit bloody.

Next Page: Silent Night, Bloody Night.