THE CURE singer Robert Smith is convinced the dark depressions he suffered in the eighties were so severe, they would have driven most men to commit suicide.

The CLOSE TO ME star admits he regularly dealt with the pressures of trying to make the perfect record by indulging in drug-taking and sinking into bleak moods, but he never allowed his mental state to ruin his passion for life.

He says, "However hopeless everything got, the pointlessness of existence was funny to me. I always had that sense that 'I can't not die, so why now?' It takes a certain mindset to decide that life is so painful that you can't continue with it.

"The option of choosing life and nothing, and choosing nothing is immense. Life never got that painful for me. Even when the void opened up before me, I always thought, 'The sun will rise whether I'm here or not, so I may as well be here for as long as I can and try to find some enjoyment.'"

05/07/2004 02:14