Quote: "I wish some regular people would do it... I really think that grandparents should get out there and run; they've got the extra time, they've got extra money, they care about the world. That's kind of the reason I did it - to kinda say, 'Hey, we gotta fix this; we can't just let the same people screw it up year after year.'" Former 2012 presidential candidate Roseanne Barr wants more pensioners to run for America's top office.
Quote: "I'm having some compromised eye troubles... I probably shouldn't drive anymore; I have hit a few people and I've got a bad reputation in Hawaii." Poor-sighted comedienne Roseanne Barr is considering hanging up the keys to her vehicle.
Quote: "I love Roseanne so much. She's such a strong person and such an important person in my life, and I hate to think of anyone I love dealing with something like this. Eyesight is such a big thing and such a big thing to lose. I know she's a fighter and she's strong. I truly believe if anyone can do it, she'll have her eyesight as long as possible." Actress Sara Gilbert offers support for her former TV mum Roseanne Barr after the comedienne opened up about her battle with macular degeneration and glaucoma.
Quote: "We've all heard it for a long time and it surprises nobody... I have hopes for this great comic. I have hopes that he will just make it clean and make it right and I do think he could do that... he's got a billion bucks." Comedienne Roseanne Barr urges Bill Cosby to address the 30-plus sexual abuse and rape allegations that have been levelled at him in the past four months.
Quote: "I was on a gay cruise on a ship down to Mexico... and the air conditioner broke. I was getting ready to just go off the side and swim to shore, it was so hot." Veteran comedienne Roseanne Barr had a nightmare experience while performing stand-up on a recent celebrity cruise.
Tweet: "If there was an internet in 1988 people would've stolen and leaked nude pictures of Roseanne and me and no one would've ever done it again." Comedian Tom Arnold believes the nude photo leak trend would have been halted before it started if it had happened when he was still married to Roseanne Barr. On Sunday (31Aug14), the personal online accounts of female celebrities including Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Upton and Mary Elizabeth Winstead were hacked and naked pictures of them surfaced on the Internet.
Quote: "Two of 'ems in their 40s. I can't believe I have kids with grey hair, for God's sake. I have five (kids)... I've got a 19 year old, that's my baby. He just graduated from high school and he's going to college; I'm so thrilled... I wanted to get him a car, but he doesn't wanna drive." Comedienne Roseanne Barr on her kids.
Tweet: "hey, Thank You Guys So Much For All Of The Nice Words About My Weight Loss! I'm inspired 2 keep going!" Comedienne Roseanne Barr is grateful for her fans' support after showing off a slimmer figure at a California event on Tuesday (08Apr14).
Tweet: "I do not concede. In fact, I accept the job of unofficial President of the Usa. I'll serve main st (street) not wall st... Congratulations Obama!" Comedienne Roseanne Barr celebrates Barack Obama's re-election as U.S. President after finishing fifth in the presidential race with a staggering 48,797 votes. The Roseanne star fronted the Peace and Freedom Party.
Quote: "It's gonna be great. I won't have to meet any new people - same old group... It was like a family over there, a large dysfunctional family." Actor John Goodman can't wait to reteam with Roseanne Barr and the crew of hit sitcom Roseanne for new trailer camp comedy Downwardly Mobile. The TV couple will play workers at a trailer park.
Quote: "I told Buck, 'If you get a vasectomy, I'll get you a Lamborghini...' because I don't want any of these girls around my son. I don't like them. I don't like it when they call him... I don't want none of these girls trying to trap my son... He told me to 'f' myself... so I'm gonna get him one of these electric cars that only goes about 100 miles a week." Comedienne Roseanne Barr is terrified her 16-year-old son Buck will fall prey to opportunistic girls.
Quote: "I have wanted to for a long time. I just miss all the fun we had... I miss making up jokes, I miss the audience, I miss all that." Comedienne Roseanne Barr is keen to reunite the cast of her hit 1990s sitcom Roseanne.
Quote: "I consider myself a farmer/writer/sex symbol." Comedienne and macadamia nut farmer Roseanne Barr jokes about how she wants to be viewed by fans.
Quote: "I did go to charm school... and it was a good thing; I learned to give a good party... how to set a table nicely." Roseanne Barr on her new party-planning skills.
Quote: "He should stick to what he does best - taking pills and hosting sobriety events." Comedienne Roseanne Barr takes aim at ex-husband Tom Arnold after insisting his recent claims she once stabbed him with a kitchen knife are false.
Quote: "I'm with my hippie freak writer musician boyfriend eight years. He lives on my nut farm in Hawaii but won't marry me." Comedienne Roseanne Barr's current beau refuses to become her fourth husband.
Quote: "I'm thinking about it, yeah. I'm thinking of something fun that is good, not just something cr**py." Actress/comedienne Roseanne Barr contemplates launching her own reality TV show.
Quote: "I am old, I am post-menopausal, I am grey - and I'm loving it! I'm tired of people talking it down.. It's OK to be old. It's kind of hot... I just feel better, I feel more content and I have some peace." Comedienne Roseanne Barr feels more confident at 58 than ever before.
Quote: "I just met someone who really cared about people and the world, that's why I connected to him. He just had a real big heart. He didn't take himself seriously." Comedienne Roseanne Barr is still mourning the loss of Heath Ledger.
Quote: "I don't like to touch hands. You don't know what people have done!" Actress Roseanne Barr is a germaphobe.
Quote: "I hate alcoholics and AA (alcoholics anonymous). If you can't drink responsibly, don't drink at all. Don't go to meetings, whine about your character flaws and blame the fact that you are a sociopath on booze." Actress Roseanne Barr on dealing with substance abuse.
Quote: "The people that make fun of me for marrying ROSEANNE because she's bigger, that's stupid because that's a great thing to marry a big woman. You can be big and fat yourself and she can never say nothin'." Comedic actor Tom Arnold defends his first wife, actress Roseanne Barr.
Quote: "Pink got them a really cute tricycle with rhinestones all over it. She didn't get two - she got one. So they'll have to share or fight over it. Roseanne Barr said she was going to get a second one because she couldn't take the idea that there was just one." Lisa Marie Presley on her celebrity pals' gifts for her newborn twin girls.
Quote: "She doesn't know me. I have nothing to defend in my life. I'm sure she's one of the many people who has opinions." Angelina Jolie on remarks Roseanne Barr made about her and partner Brad Pitt earlier this year (08). Barr branded the celebrity couple "evil" and "vacuous" in a blog posting.
Quote: "He can drink too much and still... discuss the world with such passion and good sense that you actually stop imagining him nude and really listen." Comedienne Roseanne Barr on one-time ROSEANNE co-star George Clooney.
Quote: "If I'm gonna go around telling jokes and blogging about what a phony son-of-a-bitch everyone is, I better start with myself and be grey." Roseanne Barr explains her decision to not dye her grey hair.
Quote: "One, I am cute. Two, I like guns and I am crazy, not depressed." Roseanne Barr is tired of people mistaking her for ROSIE O'DONNELL.
Quote: "I had a nose job and now my nose runs all the time." Comedienne Roseanne Barr admits there's a downside to her facial surgery.
Quote: "We were poor... but we didn't know we were poor because we were stupid too." Roseanne Barr recalls her poverty-stricken upbringing in Utah.
Quote: "California voters are very smart and they know that (PHIL) ANGELIDES can't time travel and use weapons of the future." Roseanne Barr jokes about Arnold Schwarzenegger's opponent in the race for California Governor.
Quote: "I'm all over it now... It doesn't do anything or change anything. It's just buying into something that really isn't that good." Funny lady Roseanne Barr insists she won't be going under the plastic surgeon's knife anymore.
Fact: Comedienne Roseanne Barr is set for a return to TV after signing on to guest star in an upcoming episode of hit sitcom MY NAME IS EARL.
Quote: <p>"I went up to him at a party, looked him right in the eye and said, 'Mr President, I pray for you every single day.' And you know how he replied? 'Aren't you a good girl?' Good girl! I was 50 at the time, for God's sake! Now I pray for him extra hard - that he will use the brain that God gave him." Comedienne Roseanne Barr remembers meeting US President George W Bush. </p>
Quote: <p>"Sex was never any good for me for anything other than having children and keeping the gardeners happy." Comedienne Roseanne Barr talks about her special employee bonus plan. </p>
Quote: <p>"I'm ashamed to admit that for a minute or two I wanted to keep my money all for myself, and oppress dark-skinned people as my low paid servants, but it just wasn't the thrill I thought it would be. Nothing takes the joy out of being privileged faster than finding oneself surrounded by a heavily armed underclass." Roseanne Barr decided against becoming a Republican. </p>
Quote: <p>"I guess she can't tell that guys she loves are gay or something, I don't know. I suppose I can relate. I can't tell that the guys I'm marrying are a**holes. I guess it's not that different. But that guy was gay and an a**hole, she's got bad gaydar! I liked his arched Joan Crawford eyebrow. And the friendship with Michael Jackson. There were more than a few clues." Roseanne Barr comments on Liza Minnelli's marriage to David Gest. </p>
Quote: <p>"Everything is heating up and the polar ice caps are going to melt and we're all going to drown. By next summer we'll all be dead." Comedienne Roseanne Barr fears we're all doomed as she predicts the end of the world. </p>