Martine McCutcheon "cannot bear" to watch herself in 'Love Actually.'

The 43-year-old actress starred opposite Hugh Grant in the 2003 romcom following a successful stint in BBC soap opera 'EastEnders' - which focuses on a series of couples in the political world during the build-up to Christmas - but cannot watch the festive classic anymore and remembers squirming in her seat at the premiere as she saw herself on the big screen.

She said: "Whenever 'Love Actually' comes on, my mum goes 'Babe! You're on!' and I'm like 'Mum, when are you going to get that I can't bear to watch myself back on TV?' When we were at the premiere, most of us were squirming in our seats. We were in our frocks and suits and going 'Oh God!' at this huge screen. It's the mannerisms you pull and the expressions you make and there's this massive screen with your face!"

However, the former West End star did admit that the film - which was written by 'Four Weddings and a Funeral' creator Richard Curtis - "changed her life" because the offer came through shortly after she had quit the industry and gone to Spain to visit a friend.

She told The Sunday Mirror's Notebook magazine: "I had paparazzi running after me. I was only 23 and I lived on my own - it was scary. I just thought 'I love what I do but I don't love what comes with it. So I called my agent and gave up the industry. I remember thinking, 'If I'm meant to stay in it I'll get a big sign.' I went to Spain and slept for three days straight. [Then I got the call and] He said, 'Richard Curtis has called and he wants you to star opposite Hugh Grant in a film called Love Actually and it starts next week - can you fly back?

"I literally dropped the phone. That film completely changed my life because I wouldn't have been in the industry any more. When I first saw 'Four Weddings and a Funeral', it was my absolute dream to work with Hugh Grant and Richard Curtis - I fell in love with the writing and I fell in love with Hugh."